I'd say the idea of the rest of this week seems just too pleasant. Not so long ago I was in Gdansk, saying hi to 2014, and now I'm coming back there. Gdansk PTSS conference is my second conference (check out pictures from the Warsaw conference in November of last year), yet the first to happen in the new year, therefore, I suppose, it still has a lot to live up to. No pressure though! Just a 7 hours long train ride, it's not like I expect fireworks. I do, actually. I do.
Every time I leave this city, is like the stable foundation, on which it exists in my mind, collapses. This is why it is so abstract to come back here and live my life just as I did before. Even though I have my place, my bed, lots of personal items scattered around our apartment, each time I come back, it is like I was building something from scratch.
Funny thing, my life. It constantly makes me question what is real and what is not. In about two thirds of cases, I never actually find out. It scares me how easy is to make up something in your mind, fall for an idea, a concept. It is all fun and games until someone gets hurt, which is often the case. I wish my walls would tumble down, and I didn't shut myself out every time an opportunity comes along. But what would life be without trying? Without experiencing moments of joy, without smiling to yourself like a mad person from time to time? Just a dull, empty space. I don't know about you, but it warms up my heart to be able to share my reality with someone. Moments don't last, but life gives us nothing but moments, so don't we rather take active part and enjoy ourselves while we're at it than just let them go too quickly? I often lose my logical outlook on life, which, later on, I regret terribly. Please, just make everything that happens to you count, will you?