The fault in our stars.

Alright, I have no idea how to spend money when I'm abroad.
At first I buy just the absolutely needed essentials, art gallery passes, metro tickets, food. And this is where the problems start, because what else?? Do I buy myself clothes, books or mugs and postcards? I swear, if you could only see my girls' faces when one day before the departure back to Poland I announced them I had over 1500 CZK left. Basically almost 3/4 of what I brought there. Spending money makes me anxious, maybe because I enjoy having it?

Anyway, on the last day, which I call the massive hangover slash the awesome Kampa day, I finally revisited Shakespeare and Sons bookstore and  F I N A L L Y bought "The Fault in Our Stars." I know, I'm slow. Everyone on Tumblr seemed to had already read it. I started reading as soon as I got better after the 10 hrs long coach travel. I started and... Well, now comes the tough part, because from all that I had been told about that book, everything was true. But the funny thing is, I don't know if that 'everything' suit me pretty well. The book's beautifully written, I would love to speak the way Hazel and Augustus do in this book (I don't even intend to act like I didn't have to look up about 25% of words, because I did). This book gives you a relatively huge amount of quotes to be inspired by, too. I'll do a quick selection of my favourites later in this post. In the end though, I found myself hating that book, because in less than two days of reading, it managed to make me angrier and more depressed than any of the books I'd read recently. Don't get me wrong, it is really a nice piece. Nice, meaning it leaves you depressed and frustrated and anxious about life and death, but still. I think that at this point in my life I need happy endings. At least in books.  

Maybe it was just too stimulating, maybe I'm too old for a novel about teenagers. Or maybe that was just a case of hearing too much about a book and setting my expectations too high. I wish RAK (random act of kindness; book exchange project) was working, because I feel like exchanging TFIOS for a new read for myself. Hugs and kisses.

“What a slut time is. She screws everybody.” 

“You don't get to choose if you get hurt in this world...but you do have some say in who hurts you. I like my choices.”*

* I hate my choices

“The world is not a wish-granting factory.” 

"There will come a time when all of us are dead. All of us. There will come a time when there are no human beings remaining to remember that anyone ever existed or that our species ever did anything. There will be no one left to remember Aristotle or Cleopatra, let alone you. Everything that we did and built and wrote and thought and discovered will be forgotten and all of this will have been for naught. Maybe that time is coming soon and maybe it is millions of years away, but even if we survive the collapse of our sun, we will not survive forever. There was time before organisms experienced consciousness, and there will be time after. And if the inevitability of human oblivion worries you, I encourage you to ignore it. God knows that’s what everyone else does.” 

"Without pain, how could we know joy?' This is an old argument in the field of thinking about suffering and its stupidity and lack of sophistication could be plumbed for centuries but suffice it to say that the existence of broccoli does not, in any way, affect the taste of chocolate.” 

“Because you are beautiful. I enjoy looking at beautiful people, and I decided a while ago not to deny myself the simpler pleasures of existence”

“It's a metaphor, see: You put the killing thing right between your teeth, but you don't give it the power to do its killing.”

“My thoughts are stars I cannot fathom into constellations.”