The part of my winter break that I actually spent at home seems almost insignificant. I feel somehow torn between two cities. Each of which misses something crucial.This is my first real try shooting black & white film. It feels like exploring a completely different side of lomography. I had chosen some Ilford (XP2 400, to be exact), hoping the results will be enough to convince me and my biggest critics that colorless shooting has at least as much potential as full color.
The day after my arrival, my fam & I decided to celebrate my passed exam and my sister's new job by having dinner in one of the loveliest recently opened restaurants in our town. (Recently opened, duh. I guess it's been around for longer than you may think, but I don't visit home that often and we rarely eat outside, so yeah, definitely new experience for me). And since I always like a little spin in my regular favourite dishes, having a salmon salad with grapefruit, orange and almonds, was a highlight of the day. Casa is a place with cool people, fresh energy and great cuisine, so what's not to love?
Also, using my new 28mm lens gives me a different, fun perspective. Unscrewing and changing lenses does absorb some time, but for now I do have some extra minutes to spare. I was enjoying the last days of sweet, sweet freedom, before I was thrown into university life again. But on the other hand, huuraaay, I'm shooting and posting, how incredible is that??
And every once in awhile I stumble upon something that simple and esthetically pleasing as the video below. Enjoy :) (#12 Forget shit and move on) Oh how much I need number 12 in my life nowadays. Time to flee the scene of this incident, breathe in slowly and move on. There's no use in settling for second best. Not anymore. The truth is, I feel weaker than I've felt in a long time, but on the other hand I am stronger, because I've made the first step towards self preservation. Life has always been about forgetting. And well, I'm going to nail its techniques sooner or later.
And every once in awhile I stumble upon something that simple and esthetically pleasing as the video below. Enjoy :) (#12 Forget shit and move on) Oh how much I need number 12 in my life nowadays. Time to flee the scene of this incident, breathe in slowly and move on. There's no use in settling for second best. Not anymore. The truth is, I feel weaker than I've felt in a long time, but on the other hand I am stronger, because I've made the first step towards self preservation. Life has always been about forgetting. And well, I'm going to nail its techniques sooner or later.
But what if it's not about forgetting but about accomodating? It is about some funny evolution process, which can be achieved only after your heart has been broken some certain number of times. Cutting ties is easy, it's a sharp cut between what we used to be and what we will be from this moment on. I am not proud of always burning my bridges. Not everyone is supposed to stay in your life and in your bed, but you're not the only deciding factor. Keeping your exes might be foolish, and sometimes it might just prolong the bleeding for some significant amount of time. But maybe at some point you will realize that you've grown fonder of having people around. Of having certain people around, not matter in what form. I miss X for our long conversations about music and cinema. I miss Y because of his 'fuck it ' attitude, that was always somehow uplifting and energetic. Z cooked well, and to be quite honest, I just wish I could have someone cook for me the way he did. Q gave me this incredible impression of a relationship, and just the first boost of any confidence in my life. And you, you have given me a bit of everything. A little bit of all that.
THINGS TO KEEP IN MIND from frohlocke on Vimeo.
I like these photos, the black and white photos are just as fulfilling as the color ones in my opinion. Sometimes black and white photos look a little more raw and real to me, I'm not sure why though.
ReplyDeleteI loved doing film photography in university, wish I had the time and the facilities to do it at home. Love the photos!
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You just wrote the story of my life in a way...you family is beautiful Kasia :)
ReplyDeletethank you for sharing the video*
Cudny film!:)
ReplyDeleteBeautiful photos - so fun to see black & white :) Love the picture of your sister & her hubby.
ReplyDelete#12 takes time but is so worth it once you're in that place.
Forgetting is always easier yet I usually cannot even do that, let alone accommodate. It's a lesson I think will take a lifetime to learn. That video is gorgeous though; it made me smile and made me feel better.
ReplyDeleteCrappy days are crap - lets petition against them and start a revival of the happy days, the forget the shit and embrace the joy days. I would like that very much indeed.
Shooting in black white certainly is an unfamiliar change, but it's definitely much more interesting when you view them on a more intricate scale. I like these photos, I really do.
ReplyDeleteAnd everything you've written here regarding 'moving on' is so goddamn relatable. Gosh, you have no idea how hard it is for me to forget people. I suppose, just like you, I am accomodating drastic changes in my life - even when I'm the cause of it all. You've given me so much food for throught from this post. I'll admit, I stayed up a bit thinking about what you've highlighted here. It really does remind us that life is bittersweet. It sucks how all things come to an end and we become so sad to see it go, though things could have been done differently. But you never know, fate is funny like that. I suppose you are destined to find someone who is worthy of you, Kasia. Actually, I rest my faith in that thought. If not you are perfect just the way you are.